Tuesday, November 23, 2010

一直都没有人懂我,我要习惯一个人坚强,一个人面对所有!

其实,我很累了
一直没有人懂我。我习惯假装坚强,习惯了一个人面对所有…我不知道自己到底想怎么样。
有时候,我可以很开心的和每个人说话,可以很放肆的;
可是却没有人知道,那不过是我的伪装,很刻意的伪装!
我可以让自己很快乐很快乐,可是却找不到快乐的源头,只是笨笨地在傻笑。
我不习惯把事和别人说,因为我不习惯别人用可怜的眼光看我,我更不需要人家可怜我!
其实,我很珍惜身边的人,只是感情与生活的压力上让我善于遗忘,把那些记忆通通遗忘掉~
我以为遗忘可以让自己快乐起来…
可是,我感觉到的却是更多的寂寞…更多的不开心!
黑夜来临,周围的空气很冷…
一个人躺在大床上发呆…也不知道自己脑子里在想什么…
怀念过去,仅此而已…
我也很渴望有一个人能懂我;能走进我的心…
我很累了,真的想放下所有…因为我很烦!真的让我透不过气来~
 可是现实的压力只能让我背着这些慢慢走…
 登Facebook进入自己的Profile,
 看看有多少人还在意着我,留下留言给我~
接着,一直往下拉,再下拉…
更重要的是自己关心的那个人的动态…那就是我的她
却只是看看,并不打扰…
其实我上线,是为了打发寂寞…
隐身,是为了躲避失望;躲避烦恼!更不想无思乱想的东西~

我让自己变得沉默 ,却很想多了解身边所谓的朋友,
我喜欢在很静很静的深夜,关了灯让寂静把我包裹,却又害怕黑夜…
我会每天和朋友聚聚,就是因为要避免我所谓的寂寞孤单~至少没有你在我身边,我还有一些关心我的朋友!

开心或失望

偶尔,也会寂寞的拿起手机翻开通讯录,一遍一遍的… 却不知道该打给谁~~~~~~ 再好的东西都有失去的一天,再深的记忆也有淡忘的一天;再爱的人也有远走的一天;该放弃的决放弃不了~拼命地挽留,该珍惜的来不及了!

你不再重视我对你所说过的话,说做过的每一样东西。 这是我感觉到的~

8 comments:

Unknown said...

b happy.. =)*smile*we wil try our best to help u overcome everything..don alweys play til midnite larh.. sleep early.. try to make ur day bz,playing bball.. n don alweys sleep til afternoon or afternoon go n sleep larh.. u at nite,no one acc u,u wil feel more n more lonely wan..

Jorn said...

Yea.. u're right too! lol~ at night really feel very lonely...very very lonely~ =(

Unknown said...

actually i und how you feel,just like last time i always waiting for wh..i know wat i say also cant reduce de pain in your heart..just let de time cure everything..or only when you love on another gal=)so sleep early,if not..hehehehe..i wil go knock your head!!and let you straight away fall as sleep..xD

Jorn said...

I hope i can fall asleep too! but i think i'm suffering the same feelings as what u felt last time.. LoL~ now i cant even can get to forget her.. she keep appear in my mind~ X_X dunno why,she had something lie on me, i know it is useless,if she really fall in love / flirt with other guy.. i also cant get to accept it lo.. maybe i really fall in love with her deeeeeply~ .<

Unknown said...

same as last time case..but i more serious than you..i even one week can dream of him four or three times den wake up and cry..dat time,i almost one day only sleep 4 or 3 hours only..i almost dead dat time..don even dare to sleep also><~~too love him last time..but believe me,mayb god want you go through sumting before you meet de right gal,like now de me..i get my happiness adde..i know you stil wil be suffering now,but very fast you wil be okay..if you stil feel sad,i can acc you de=)since i adde treat you as my family also..

Jorn said...

yea~ maybe god really want me go through something before i meet de right girl lur~ X_X
I RARELY dream..but now i insomnia ler~ i cant even sleep..keep think of her.. my exam coming~ worry alot alot alot!
my situation is wan love her, cannot!
choose dun wan to love her, also cannot! T_T

Jorn said...

btw,i don't aspect u read my blog de lo..haha! but now at least i know still got ppl care about me and know how do i feel~ =)

Unknown said...

exam coming den study lu><~~exam is important than everything fer a student..bt i know how u feel..once u take de books n study,u wil automaticly tink bout her den no nid to study anymore=.="

arggghhhh..i cant help u.. bt juz can advise u,if cont liddat den u better one day take at least an hour to study.. try to focus=)good luck ya in ur coming exam..